Cool Metaphor For Figuring Stuff Out (and getting better)
by Kaseytrue
Summary: Fix It Fic for "everything that kills me makes me feel alive" by Princex N Dave has voices in his head. He can hear all the Dead!Daves condemning him for not getting stuff right. He hears Bro's recriminations. No-one notices til he takes drastic measures to make the voices stop. Now they think he's crazy, except he's not. Karkat and Gamzee kidnap him, to protect him. Now What?
1. Karkat: Save Dave From His Friends

Extended Summary:

Fix It Fic for "everything that kills me makes me feel alive" by Princex_N

Dave has voices in his head. He can hear all the Dead!Daves condemning him for his actions, for letting them die, for not getting shit right.

He hears Bro's recriminations, why couldn't you save me's.

No-one noticed til Dave bashed his skull in trying to make the voices stop.

Now they think he's crazy, and they've taken action to keep him from hurting himself.

Except he's not insane, he's just unable to deal with this aspect of his time powers.

Karkat sees this and decides to kidnap him, so he and Gamzee can protect him til he gets his feet back under him.

ForeNote:

This work was inspired by and is a continuation of "everything that kills me makes me feel alive" by Princex_N on AO3 done with full permission by the Original Author. I am fully capable of providing proof of permissions if necessary.

This is a Fanwork, I make no money from the writing or publishing of this work, and I do not own Homestuck.

There's some necessary stuff in the End Note, about how my universe is different from the others. I just didn't want to spam y'all with it at the beginning of the chapter like a douche.

I need to apologize if people are Out of Character, cause this is my first Homestuck fic and I'm not really sure I know their personalities as well as I should.

Ch. 1 Karkat: Save Dave From Well Meaning Torture By Friends Who Don't Get It

Karkat was the one who figured it out.

The humans thought he was hallucinating... that he'd gone insane, but Karkat remembered Sollux talking about the voices.

It made sense, it just did and fuck the other humans trying to figure out what to do with the insane boy.

Karkat knew though, just like he knew when the voices in Gamzee's head were real and not just him, but someone else in his mind twisting him up.

He shouts at them all to get out of the room.

They've done enough, tying him to his fucking bed? "FUCK YOU HE'S NOT EVEN CONSCIOUS YOU PAN ROTTED PIECES OF HUMAN EXCREMENT! WHAT DO YOU THINK HE'S GONNA DO ANYWAY?! YOU THINK HE'LL RUN AWAY? HE COULDN'T EVEN MOVE HIS ARMS IF HE WANTED! JUST GET OUT!"

Karkat gets it, he just knows Dave isn't insane it's just that he's having trouble with a secondary power.

Flashback

When Karkat finally got the code for soper, he didn't hesitate to start giving it to Gamzee.

Everyone else thought he was crazy but Karkat knew that it helped dampen Gamzee's susceptibility to scionic interference.

He knew that Soper stopped the day terrors which all trolls got, he also knew that those were

They all just thought it made him high, and the humans thought it was like pot; but when Gamzee calmed down they stopped trying to stop Karkat.

They figured if anyone could handle Gamzee it was Karkat. The trolls thought that if Karkat got hurt because of Gamzee's rages than he deserved it for not just culling the troll. The humans just thought that they would get revenge if that happened.

Present

Karkat waited a while after the humans and trolls had all left the room, before tapping on the vent in the corner.

Gamzee dropped down, and loomed over the two smaller forms, one of which was tied to a bed.

A deep rattling sound started in the larger trolls thorax, "WhAt dId tHoSe uNmIrAcUlOuS MoThErFuCkErS Do tO HiM? tHiS AiN'T EvEn rIgHt!" Gamzee starts getting louder toward the end.

"SHOOSH YOU'LL GET US CAUGHT. WE GOTTA GET HIM OUT OF HERE SO WE CAN TAKE CARE OF HIM. WE CAN'T LET THEM KEEP HIM LIKE THIS OR HE'LL NEVER GET HIS SHIT UNDER CONTROL." Karkat whispered as quietly as he could. "JUST CUT HIM LOOSE AND GET HIM IN THE VENT..." The shouty troll slumped in resignation, "GOTTA GET HIM AWAY FROM THEM BEFORE THEY MESS HIM UP WORSE THAN HE DID TO HIMSELF."

Gamzee paused in his assessment of the DaveHuman to look up at Karkat before papping his cheek. "No kArBrO YoU CaN'T Be dOiNg tHaT To yOuRsElF. i gOt nO KnOwLeDgE Of hOw tHiS AlL Up aNd hApPeNeD BuT I KnOw mY BeSt fRiEnD DiDn't cAuSe iT."

Karkat smiled shakily at Gamzee for a moment before he heard John talking super loud and getting closer. Karkat looks at Gamzee in fear for a moment before Gamzee slices the ropes holding the human to the concupiscent platform and hauls ass into the vent. Then he jumps back down and grabs Karkat to shove him in the vent frantically before shutting the vent behind him. He then leads the smaller troll through the maze of vents quickly, while managing to carry Dave gently in one arm like a baby. It was weird how well he was managing that considering their respective sizes and also how rail-thin-skinny Gamzee is.

"GoNnA HaVe tO Go uNdErWaTeR In a mInUtE KaRbRo cAn't hAvE AnY UnFuNnY MoThErFuCkErS FiNdInG Us." Gamzee said as they came to another drop down, this one into quite a bit of water.(My headcanon has the meteor having all kinds of shit like the pipeburst that left a ton of the meteor flooded, and also trolls are insect based, so I think they'd have different biology.)

"SHIT GAMZEE NO! HUMANS CANT HOLD THEIR BREATH WHEN THEY'RE ASLEEP. I'VE BEEN WATCHING THEIR MOVIES AND IT'S A COMMON THING. IF A HUMAN IS ASLEEP WHEN THEY GO IN THE WATER THEIR HUMAN LUNGS BREATH IN THE WATER AND THEY DIE!"Karkat grabbed Gamzee before he could lower himself into the flooded passage with the human. "ISN'T THERE ANOTHER WAY?"

Gamzee took a good long moment to think before he shook his head, "SoRrY KaRbRo, BuT ThIs tHe oNlY MoThErFuCkInG WaY AiN'T GoNnA Be tRaCkEd bY ThE BlInD-SiS. sHe'lL FoLlOw tHaT TrAiL Of mIrAcUlOuS CaNdY ReD YoU BeEn dRiPpIn tHe wHoLe wAy."

Karkat took a long moment to think, "COULD YOU TAKE HIM A DIFFERENT ROUTE IF I TOOK THIS ONE TO GET RID OF MY TRAIL?"

Gamzee shook his head, "NaH ThAt wOuLdN'T WoRk nOnE CaUsE ShE'D SmElL HiS BlOoD GoIn a dIfFeReNt wAy." Gamzee said pointing at the bloody bandages wrapped around Dave's head.

Karkat snarled as he punched the wall. "FUCK! BULGE BLISTERING SHIT HUMPING NOOK SNIFFING FUCK!" Then they both froze as they heard the sound of voices and banging coming closer. "GAMZEE!"

Gamzee looked down at the two smaller bodies and made a decision. "SoRrY KaRbRo…" He grabbed the smaller troll and jumped into the water.

Gamzee had never learned to swim before, no point if he couldn't stay with his Lusus in the water. Once he found the submerged corridors though he had nothing better to do than learn to swim through them. He found out he was actually really good at swimming, and that those vestigial gills were actually somewhat functional. He probably couldn't survive using them long term but they had done the job when he got lost and couldn't find the surface for longer than he had stored air in his bellowsacs.

He doesn't waste time though cause Karbro wouldn't joke about the DaveHuman's ability to hold his breath. Gamzee swims as fast as he can through as many turnarounds as he can with both arms full, but this is important and he will not mess this up. He has to lose her, and he has to get Dave out of the water before he dies. The human is moving strangely, like he's jerking or shaking or something.

Gamzee: Hurry The Fuck Up

Gamzee speeds the fuck up, swimming faster than he knew he even could. Cause he doesn't want to kill anyone else, and if he killed Dave trying to save him…

He sees the door, and lets go of Karkat for a moment to open it up. Then he's in and he yanks Karkat through before it closes and he swims up the stairs, and into his room. He pulls Karkat and Dave out of the water and the human flails himself out of Gamzee's arms and starts convulsing and retching up water.

Dave slumps against the ground and turns to stare at the two trolls with… candy red eyes. "MiRaClEs…" Gamzee breathes out in awe, "KaRbRo hE'S A ReDbLoOd, IsN'T ThAt jUsT A MoThErFuCkInG MiRaClE? yOuR EyEs gOnNa lOoK LiKe tHaT WhEn yOu hIt yOuR AdUlT MoLt dIaMoNd mInE?"

Karkat just looked between the two boys and around the room in awe. "WE ALL THOUGHT YOU WERE HIDING OUT IN THAT ROOM WITH ALL THE HEADS." Karkat says dazed, and Gamzee takes a moment to really look him over. "HEY!" Karkat shouts as Gamzee grabs him. "GAMZEE STOP!"

Gamzee is sniffing at the wounds on Karkat's arms and then literally tears the shirt off of him, just rips it down the front and kneels down in front of Karkat licking at his wounds. Gamzee was licking at the grubscars that turned out were actually thorax gills to get them to close up and stop making Karkat wheeze, when Dave made a loud noise. "Wow ok all about the free porn just as much as the next guy, but I'm gonna get out of here so y'all can have this block all to yourselves… or I can just sit down so the murder clown doesn't kill me, can do that too." Dave said when Gamzee started emitting that thorax rattle again. "Could you at least tell me why my strife specibus is empty? Please?"

The room was strikingly similar to Gamzee's room in his hive, with the distinct difference of the recuperacoon being replaced by a concupiscent platform or Bed as Dave saw it, which was actually rather large.

Gamzee was still blocking the door and Karkat was too busy being taken care of for once. Dave deciding he had nothing to lose, climbed on the bed and eventually fell asleep to Gamzee whispering Pale-Nothings to Karkat.

It never even occurred to him to ask why he wasn't being inundated with chatter from Dead!Daves and Bro.

Endnotes:

Ok so I'm of the opinion that seers are not the only ones with knowledge. I mean everyone somehow knows instinctively how to use their powers, so I think that everyone has some intimate knowing of things with no way to explain how they know them.

Gamzee knows how to use the Chucklevoodoos. Dave knows how to change time. It's just there instinctively, but only some of the characters realize this.

Karkat has the innate ability to know why someone is freaking out. Because Lime Bloods were there to soothe Highblood rages, and to soothe those rages you have to know why they are happening. Karkat was confused by Gamzee's rage to begin with because Gamzee wasn't to blame for it. His rages were triggered by the voices but they weren't a part of Gamzee.

Now Gamzee is back on Soper.

Now don't get me wrong, Gamzee is back on Soper, but Karkat limits his intake. Makes sure he eats real food with it, just basically takes care of him. Anyway Gamzee is back on Soper, but he isn't High. It's a medication, but he's not abusing it ok? He's not HighBloodRage!Gamzee, but he's not High!Gamzee either, he's somewhere in the middle probably where he would have been if he'd never got addicted in the first place, and made it so he couldn't maintain barriers on his mind.

Also Karkat is not a pale!slut or any other such abhorrent slur, it is natural for him to want to fix things. He's still young and sometimes the urge to help will cause him to stray from the conventional romantic script. He will learn how to maintain a distance from let's call them his patients, but that's a long time coming.


	2. Gamzee: Be the Creeper Clown

Chapter 2 Summary

Gamzee watches Dave and Karkat sleep… yeah.

Then he flirts with Dave… Ok?!

Dave does his best not to flip out and set off the murder clown, but it would work a lot better if Gamzee stopped petting him.

Basically Fluff, Pale Fluff, and More Fluff, with a few flushed solicitations thrown in cause Gamzee is Gamzee.

* * *

Ch. 2 ForeNote

Gamzee and Karkat are Serendipitous. Fact!

Dave is pitiable as fuck. Fact!

Karkat is not cheating… Fact?

Gamzee thinks Dave is pitiable as fuck too… ?

Gamzee wants to break whoever hurt Dave. Fact!

Gamzee thinks Dave looks like a mother-fucking miracle laid out on Gamzee's Concupiscent Platform. Fact!

Karkat looks Motherfucking miraculous laying beside Dave on Gamzee's Concupiscent Platform. Fact.

Gamzee really likes the look of the two snuggled up together in sleep. Fact…

Gamzee is starting to weird out the writer a little bit, cause she thought this was going in a paler direction. Fact…?! WTF Gam?

* * *

" _Thinking out loud without realizing it."_

 _This is thinking_

I am placing emphasis like _this._

Normal Speech

 **Yelling**

* * *

Ch. 2 Gamzee: Creep on your Moirail and Flirt With the Lusus Haired Human

 _I'M NoT CrEePiNg oN My pAlEbRo, I'M JuSt wAtChInG OuT FoR HiM LiKe a gOoD MoIrAiL._ Gamzee thinks indignantly, while unapologetically staring at Karkat while he sleeps. _"He's jUsT So pItIaBlE, wItH ThOsE TiNy bLuNt hOrNs, AnD ThOsE TiNy bLuNt tEeTh."_ Gamzee stares at the way the night shirt he loaned Karkat has ridden up on one side all the way to his armpit, and _ThOsE PrEtTy pReTtY MiRaClE ReD GiLl sLiTs,_ on Karkat's side where land dwellers should have grub scars.

 _"WaNnA TaStE YoUr gIlLs aGaIn pAlEmAtE… sO WeAk mY LoVe sO PiTiAbLe, CaN'T EvEn cLoSe yOuR OwN GiLlS. gOtTa hAvE SoMeOnE LiCk yOuR GiLlS ClOsEd fOr yOu lIkE A WiGgLeR."_ Gamzee purrs completely unaware that he's speaking aloud or that the human is awake and listening.

" _So sWeEt mY PaLeLoVe, AnD So lOuD LiKe a mOtHeR-FuCkInG BuLlHoRn wHeN YoU GeT YoUr sHoUt oN."_ Gamzee waxed poetics about his Karkat for a while until his voice ran deeper, and his words got kinda scary for the human.

Gamzee: Spin Some Miraculous Rhymes Bout Your Moirail

"lOvE YoUr sKiN So sOfT So eAsY To mArK

YoUr bAcK HoW I LoVe tO MaKe iT ArCh

YoUr bOnEs sO BrItTlE I CoUlD BrEaK YoU In tWo

YoUr eYeS So wEaK I CaN SeE ThRiCe aS WeLl iN ThE DaRk aS YoU

"lOvE ThE SoUnD Of yOuR BlOoD As iT PuMpS

ThE SoUnD Of yOuR HeArT ThUmP ThUmP ThUmP

MoViNg tO ThE BeAt oF YoUr dRuM

LiStEn tO YoU BrEaTh iN ThE DaRk aS YoU HuM

"sInG Me a sOnG Of yOuR SiGhS

NoNe oF ThE WhErEfOrE Or wHy's

TeLl mE YoUr dReAmS In yOuR EyEs

NeVeR To tElL Me nO LiEs

"bLiSs iS ThE WhImPeR YoU BrEaTh

WhEn i tAkE YoU AnD MaKe yOu bElIeVe

PlEaSe iS ThE WoRd tHaT YoU WhIsPeR

WhEn aGaInSt mY LiPs yOu dO ShIvEr

"gIvE Me yOuR AlL YoUr eVeRyThInG

GiVe mE YoUrSeLf aS A WhOlE

GiVe yOuRsElF To mE AnD I WiLl dO AnYtHiNg

To gIvE YoU It aLl

"i cOuLd cUt yOuR SkIn wItH My cLaWs

BrEaK YoUr bAcK WiTh tHiS HaNd

NeVeR HaVe tO WoRrY If i fAlL

CaUsE Of yOu i wIlL AlWaYs lAnD

"cOuLd sLiT YoUr tHrOaT In yOuR SlEeP

DrEnCh mY BeD WiTh tHe bLoOd yOu wOuLd bLeEd

ReD As mErCy rEd aS MiRaClEs iNtO My bRaIn iT WoUlD SeEp

I'D PlAnT YoU DeEp dOwN AnD YoU'D GrOw aS A SeEd

"tO ReAcH HeIgHtS Of tHe sKiEs

HiGhEr tHaN A BiRd cOuLd eVeR RiSe

I TeLl yOu nO LiEs

As i lOoK In yOuR EyEs

"lOvE YoUr bLoOd mY PaLe lItTlE OnE

LoVe tHe lOoK As yOu cOmE AlL UnDoNe"

Gamzee broke off as the humans hand came into Gam's line of sight, and when had he gotten so close he wondered. He leaned back so he wasn't right against his Karkat, and could see the boy right beside him.

"Karkat!" Dave whispered shaking the small trolls shoulder, "Your clown needs you. He's being weird talking bout your blood and breaking bones. Karkat!"

Gamzee smiled indulgently at the human, as Karkat rolled onto his side papping the human before manhandling him into being the little spoon. "SHOOSH… GO BACK TO SLEEP 'S TOO EARLY." The tiny troll said stroking the humans face, before falling back asleep.

Dave stared over his shoulder at the huge juggalo troll with rising terror. "He didn't mean it…" Dave squeaked out "He's asleep… probably thought I was you… it's not his fault…" He flinched as Gamzee reached over and threaded, his _huge_ fingers through Dave's hair.

"ShOoSh, LiTtLe mOtHeR-FuCkEr, AiN'T MaD At yOu." He smiled before moving to be in front of Dave, pulling him and Karkat closer and slipping one leg between Dave's thighs. "KaRbRo oNcE ShOoShEd a hOrN At hAd hOnKeD In oUr pIlE WhIlE We wAs gEtTiN OuR SnOoZe oN." He ran his fingers through Dave's hair and nuzzled the human's neck, using his most comforting voice he said "ThIs mOtHeR-FuCkEr aIn't gEtTiN HiS RaGe oN At yOu bOuT ThAt." using that same deep rumble that reminded the human instinctively of a growl.

Gamzee: Use Your Chucklevoodoos Like Karkat's Been Teaching You

 _HuH? i'm nOt gEtTiN My pAn aRoUnD ThAt? KaR'S BeEn tEaChIn mE AlL KiNdS Of mIrAcLeS WiTh mY VoOdOo's_

Gamzee: Make Dave Not Afraid

 _Oh tHaT OnE, i cAn dO ThAt eAsY._

A rumble built in the clowns chest for a long moment causing the human to internally freak out more and more.

Suddenly the human smelt something really really good, and all his muscles just relaxed on their own. He buried his nose in the clowns throat, and just lay there in a fog of endorphins caused by the sudden lack of fear. After a few minutes he slipped into a deep sleep, and Gam let up on the 'DoN'T Be sCaReD I WoN'T HuRt yOu, NoThInG CaN HuRt yOu jUsT ReLaX I'Ll pRoTeCt yOu.' Voodoos.

Gamzee chuckled as he licked at the humans throat and ears, best let everyone with a working sniffer know that the Lusus Haired, Red Eyed Human was his now. He even sucked a kiss mark into the humans pale pale easily marked skin, right on his pulse point. He sucked on the spot for a long time, alternating sucking, licking, and lightly biting at it. It was so interesting to feel the difference between the beat of a troll's blood-pusher, and a humans.

 _TwO BeAtS InStEaD Of tHrEe, It's sO WeIrD LiKe bEaT BeAt pAuSe. KaRkAt's bLoOd pUmPs fAsTeR ThAn mInE By a lOt, BuT It's sTiLl bEaT BeAt bEaT PaUsE PaUsE PaUsE. . . lIkE HeArTbEaTs aRe bEaUtIfUl_. When Kar started to wake from Gamzee's shifting, Gam leaned over Dave and kissed Kar back to sleep with kisses pale as bone, and stroking Karkats horn so sweet. Kar started purring and slipped back to sleep, and Gamzee went back to licking the humans throat lazily.

Gamzee: Fall Asleep With Your Teeth Full of Strider Neck

Gamzee snuggled down and fell asleep with his teeth lightly gripping Daves neck. Yeah no way that's gonna turn out badly right?

* * *

End Note

Ok so Gamzee just wouldn't shut up about it, and I just had zero control. He Ships It, and damned if his descriptions don't get me shipping it.

So no-one trusts Gamzee no matter what assurances Karkat gives them. They don't trust Gam, and they don't trust Kar to handle Gam. Karkat actually had to threaten evisceration them to let him take care of Gam, and when Gamzee immediately ran to the vents it was all they needed to know they were right. Still for Karkat's sake they don't kill Gamzee when they see him, and they don't talk bad about him in front of Karkat.

Therefore, that means that Karkat can't trust anyone but Gamzee. At least that's the way Karkat sees it.

P.S. Inspiration for the romance definitions from Laurasaurus, Night of Spades.


End file.
